I've been in Australia for 11 months
now and this year has without any doubt been the most interesting
year of my life. I've learned a lot about people but even more about
myself. I'm more understanding towards other people after seeing many
different lifestyles, many different problems. On the other hand I've
met selfish, disgusting and unworthy people and I am more cynical and
hate people more than ever. Living in a hostel can get very tiring
from time to time and sometimes I feel so tired having people around
me all the time that I would just like to be mean to everyone, on
purpose. It would be nice to be able to say that this trait only
surfaces when I'm unwell but unfortunately the fact is that I was
born mean and ill-spirited and since teenage years have made
reasonable effort to hide my true character. I'm not even that unwell
anymore. The sick eye is almost normal but I'm still mean.
Anna will leave Sydney next week and to
my utter horror I noticed that she is effectively my only friend in
Sydney. In all these 6 months I've been here I haven't been able to
make one single friend here. I have another friend here, yes, but I
already knew her in Finland, so I have badly failed the mission of
making new friends. When it comes to friends I've always thought that
quality beats quantity any day but in this kind of situations my
principle fails a bit. Actually I noticed that throughout my life
I've usually had one, maximum two, good friends with whom I spend
most of my time. Now it seems like I will spend a solitary, quiet
month in the hostel without anyone to talk to after work. At the same
time I feel like that my interest towards meeting people is zero. I'm
tired of having people around me all the time and I'm so not going to
invest my precious time here trying to make new friends who are most
likely only going to stay in my life for the short period of time I
still have left in Sydney. Luckily I have my trip to Asia to plan,
that will keep my mind occupied. I've already booked my flight to
Vietnam, that'll be 29 of April. I'll stay in Saigon for around one
week and then probably head to Singapore, Malaysia and finally end up
in Bangkok where I will catch my flight to Helsinki. I decided to pay
extra for comfort and booked a slightly more expensive direct flight
to Finland. Plus, it's Finnair and I can be sure the service is good.
A week ago I told my boss I will be
leaving in the end of April. It made me kind of happy that my
co-workers seemed to be genuinely sorry that I'll leave. Many of them
asked if I could extend my visa but that's not possible. I'm sad to
leave my job, too. First time in a couple of years I have a job I
actually love. Now someone might think it's not normal to love
ironing but I do. Besides, my job has been the only normal thing in
my life during my stay in Sydney, the only place not full of
backpackers, the only place where life is not full of booze and
parties. I've always been somewhat against that kind of lifestyle and
here I'm more sure than ever that I made the right choice, saying no
to alcohol and parties. What's the point to go to the other end of
the world if you'll just go there to drink beer? That can be
accomplished at home too, and at a lower cost.
I'd like to spend the summer in
Finland, doing some simple summer job and try to find my sense of
humor that I seem to have lost during my travels. Then when the
autumn comes, I'd like to head back to some warm, nice location
without the risk of snow and frost. If anyone knows a place where
they need a motivated summer help, let me know :)
Ei kommentteja:
Lähetä kommentti